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I am 18 years old
 HOME | DATING BLOG September 5, 2010

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***QUESTION***
February 16, 2010 @ 4:25:51 AM EST



Hey -

I am 18 years old and just graduated high school.
I used to be a MAJOR wuss and when I was younger I
was always a shy kid who was picked on a lot
because I was a short, skinny kid that never stood
up for myself.   And worst of all, I never took
advantage of high school to get girls!   I started
getting your newsletter earlier this year and the
cocky + funny attitude changed my life in more
ways than one. I hang out with guys that get the
hottest high school girls you can ever imagine.
Not only do they get 9's and 10's, I see these
girls obsess over them.   I was around them so much
that I tried to model thier behavior around girls
and I noticed that EVERYTHING you preach about,
comes to them NATURALLY.   Every tip of advice
you've given to guys ACTUALLY works, and Ive seen
it first hand.

I started using cocky + funny myself and even use
lines that Ive seen my friends use in past cases.
I saw a HOT girl in the mall and she was checking
herself out in a pocket mirror so I said "don't
worry, your hair doesn't look THATTT bad".   She
started laughing even though I just made fun of
her!   I asked for her email and when she said she
doenst have the internet, I used your line "well
do you have electricity"?   AGAIN the girl laughed,
and I ended up getting her phone # and I hooked up
with her that weekend!

MY QUESTION - my natural personality has
transformed from a wussy shy nice kid to a guy
that's gonna bust your balls, but a nice guy at
heart.   I made a lot more girl "friends" too, but
whenever they try to tell me their sad stories, I
let them know Im not their boyfriend and do not
care. Whenever I gain the courage to use
cocky+funny, it WORKS but my problem is even
though I've seen this work in action, I fear I
don't know enough cocky+funny lines to keep up a
conversation with a girl.   Also, do you recommend
hitting on random strangers you see, because my
friends say they never really hit on strangers
unless they have a reason to go up and talk to
them.   My friends also say to ALWAYS have 5
"project girls" and never focus on one girl.   Is
this true? please write back.

E from NYC

>>>MY COMMENTS:

    It's interesting, because I actually discovered
the Cocky & Funny technique by watching guys who
were good with women. In fact, a guy who is now a
good friend was trying to explain the concept to
me a few years back... and he was the first one to
say "Cocky & Funny." Of course, I had no idea what
he was talking about at the time. It really made
no sense to me.

    But after I started working with it and
watching other guys who were really successful
with women, I learned how it worked.

    It sounds like you're really getting it -
congrats!

    As for your questions...

    Don't worry about being able to "come up with
enough lines to keep up a conversation." Just do
what you can, and enjoy yourself. A few Cocky &
Funny lines used here and there are MUCH better
than nothing at all.

    If you feel like approaching strangers, great.
If you just realize that most women are going to
be nice, but some will be either unavailable or
unfriendly then you'll be fine. I have personally
had great success meeting "strangers," and as my
good friend Rick says, "Every friend you have
started out as a stranger...."

    And as for the "5 project girls", you're
cracking me up over here. If you like the idea of
staying single and dating a lot of different
women, then this is the way to do it! Just make
sure they don't turn into your personal
"psychological projects".

    Thanks for your email.
 

 
     
  The Busiest Online Dating Cities This Summer...  
 

... according to Match.com that is. I received a note from their PR folks the other day, showing some stats about which US cities were heating up their system via winks, emails and chats for the past few months. They are:

      Miami, FL
      New York, NY
      Los Angeles, CA
      Chicago, IL
      Washington, DC
      Dallas, TX
      San Diego, CA
      Phoenix, AZ
      Boston, MA
      Houston, TX

Do you live in one of these cities, and have you noticed more singles online and making contact this summer? Or do you disagree with this list, and feel that other locations were overlooked and deserve closer review?

Related: Projected Online Dating Growth to 2012, Top US City for Being Single in 2009.

The Busiest Online Dating Cities This Summer... originally appeared on About.com Dating on Sunday, August 29th, 2010 at 19:27:22.

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  Are You in a Healthy Relationship?  
 

Some days, I get a kick out of how many dating questions revolve around whether or not a relationship is viable, healthy or just plain wrong. Others, like the day when I created the Healthy Relationship Quiz, I wonder how many of us actually know what a healthy relationship is, what it looks like in reality, and how to tell when we're in the thick of it.

On paper its easy to tell: healthy means mutual respect, love and caring without abuse, codependency or drama. But we're all human, and sometimes its a tad difficult to tell the difference between being worked on and red flag territory.

So what's your definition of a healthy relationship? What muddies the waters for you, if anything?

Are You in a Healthy Relationship? originally appeared on About.com Dating on Wednesday, August 25th, 2010 at 01:21:38.

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